It's the little things...

Sometimes, I forget the little differences that exist in my life. For those of you with family members (or you, yourself) that have experienced a stroke, there might be some minor "deficiencies" that might not be even noticed at first.

I would like to let others know a little known fact or 2 from my personal experience (not to say that these will apply to everyone):

1) if you work really hard at your rehabilitation, the best improvement will happen in the first 6 months (this, they usually tell you).

2) There comes a time (for me, it was at month 19) when scar tissue may set in within your brain in the area that is no longer swollen from the stroke's after-effects. I experienced a major set-back or two, but this is not necessarily permanent, nor is it guaranteed to happen. I lost the ability to drive because my right hip was too weak to allow for that kind of movement, as well as my vision being shifted about 30 degrees off-center, so my perception was off. All this added up to mean that driving was too exhausting for safe travels to anywhere, and the doctor asked for my license again. I permanently lost the ability to walk in heels. Like I said, everyone is different, and my weakness greatly affected my quad muscle and my right hip. BUT at least I can walk, although I use a cane for stability.

3) Like I said before, a clot or a stroke can take up to 72-hours to show up on a CT scan, so if you feel the signs, seek a second opinion. Even if that means consulting another ER. Mine was left for nearly 3 days, and I was lucky to have survived that.

4) Strokes do not hurt. They make you sleepier than you have ever been in your life. I was starving, but I fell asleep during the first spoonful of my oatmeal.

5) This brings me to my second point: if you suspect someone has had a stroke, DON'T feed them until the doctor says that it is OK. They could choke to death on their food (by aspirating on their food), and because in some cases, the muscles don't work on one side of the throat, the Heimlich maneuver may not work.

6) I personally have lost my peripheral vision from both eyes. This is normal. Some people lose their vision totally from one or both eyes. Sometimes it comes back, and sometimes it does not. Either way, be patient and be aware.

7) With a left-sided stroke, they might have to learn to talk again. This means that is English is not the primary language spoken in your house, it is best that you show up and help out the speech therapist. Also, they will need LOTS of practice in any language. I remember being in rehab. with a gentleman that came in not speaking much English, but since his family was never there, he ended up speaking nothing but English by the time that he was released, because no one on his team knew Spanish. I was still stuck in my head (my speech was slow in returning because of my aphasia and the area in which I had my stroke), or I could have tried to help out, but I was still calling all food "Oh Mee," which was as close as I could get to "oatmeal," which symbolized all food at first.

8) With a right-sided stroke, please be very understanding. It can delete memories and also scramble speech or speech recognition. This makes communication very hard and frustrating on all parts. Spouses have heartbreaking moments sometimes because their spouse honestly has no idea who they are (to be fair, in some cases, they do not recognize anyone, if the injury is in that part of the brain. In rare cases, their ability to differentiate faces from each other or from fruit might be gone).

9) There might be movements that are particularly difficult for a person that has had a stroke. For me, it is the pancake movement. Turning my wrist over with any sort of weight on it (like a spatula or cooking spoon) is very difficult for me. It has gotten easier, but I still have my days.

10) Just because someone has gotten help and was able to do stuff like walking up a short flight of stairs does not mean that this will be the case every day. Like anything else, every day is different, and some days, the person will have more pain or have more muscle-weakness than others. Be patient and understanding, please.

It took me 45 minutes to type a 3 sentence (probably 15 word) note to the law school office when I got home from the hospital after my stroke. Now, I can type a lot more, but I can not write more than about 2 sentences by hand even 4 years later.

Everyone is different, so please do not think that I am the only example (or even the best one).

When I remember some of the other little things, I will post again. Goodnight.